This is better than an overdose of Viagara, spending quality time with one of Elliot Spitzer's tramps or going on a picnic with Rosie O'Fat. Ponder this--If Mamma Cass Elliott had shared her Panty Melt with Karen Carpenter, chances are, they would both be with us today.
Oh Chosen One, Oh Messiah---Prove to me that you're no fool, and walk across my swimming pool..........Prove to me that you're divine, and change Bud Light into fine, swine wine. At the conclusion of this post, I am going out for a trans-fat extravaganza. I found this sports bar that makes deep fried, corn beef, cabbage and cheese rolls, the size of one of your Green Cars.
Oh.....can't tell you the locale, for fear of getting kneecapped from your thought police, but I have also found cartons of generic butts for 20 bucks a crack, by crackie. And......provided the gross sales of food do not exceed 20%, you can smoke in these places too.
My Golden Adonnis, svelte waistline is a buff, snug, mouth-watering 38-40 and that's on a 5-10, rock-solid frame. Me, Frank and the Pillsbury Doughboy could be triplets, stumping for piglets. See, I'm not only truculent and obnoxious, I'm self-depracating too.
For now, some "Deep Thoughts" by Single Hand(y)-- a poem in your honor Mr. President, its called "The Socialist, Welfare Poem." Enjoy
I cross the ocean, poor and broke,
I take the bus, see employment folk.
Nice man treat me good in there,
Says I need to get welfare.
Says I need to get welfare.
Welfare said "you come no more."
We'll send the check, right to your door.
Welfare checks can make you wealthy,
Medicaid will keep you healthy.
Bernie Maid Off with all your money
Way to go, American dummy.
Text family tree in Sand Dune land,
Blue Tooth says, "come fast as u can."
They come spewing terror,
Live inside their ford trucks,
Till they buy a big house,
With our welfare bucks.
When they arrive, we live together,
Get more checks, it justs gets better.
Multiple families, we move them in,
But neighbors patience is wearing thin.
His house foreclosed, I buy it for rent,
No more camp-outs, pitching tents.
Send for low-lifes and illegal trash,
So they can share in the welfare cash.
How bout this socialism, its all good,
Pipeheads and zealots own your hood.
For our best hobby, its called breeding,
Welfare pay for babies feeding.
Who needs dentist or birth control pills?
Raise those taxes, so we have no bills.
This countries crazy, they pay all year,
To keep socialism alive, and running here.
We love America, its a lovely place,
Way too good for the present race,
Can't relate to us, then you can scram,
And take your free markets to Pakistan.
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